Wet is bad. Dry is good. It's not rocket science.

Perhaps it's my fault. Perhaps I have confused my people (they're such simple minded creatures after all) by the fact that I like to sit in the bathroom window while they are in the shower. That's because it's cool in there. There's a curtin to shield me from the water, and if folks see you naked once in a while it serves you right! They see me naked most of the time.

This does not mean I like being wet. It does not mean I like water around me.

So to the man, if you drop a bottle of that strange green water (exactly what mountian do you go to get that stuff anyhow?) wait a few minuets before opening it. Specifically, wait until I am out of the room. Your "dew" not only tastes terrible when I am tryign to get it out of my fur, but I was feeling prickely for an hour afterwards. And I stuck to everything for a day after.

And to the woman, if you feel that lunch is not settling too well with you, please pick me up off of your lap and set me down on the ground gently rather than just shoving me off and reaching for your bucket. Oh and quick note; you didn't entirely get it all in the bucket. Ugh.

And what's wrong with the woman anyhow? Does she object to storks so strongly that it makes her ill?