So the woman and I were having a talk last night. She was wondering if I had fleas. I assured her I didn't. She didn't believe me, so she grabs me and puts me on my back holding my legs while the man stuffed a blanket down my throat! Then she starts pawing over my tummy looking for fleas. I mentioned to them at this point that I don't like being touched there and would you please get this blanket away from me?? Especially since it's a 101 Dalmations blanket! Honestly could you GET any more inslulting???

I guess you could. Because then they flipped me over and tried to search my neck.

I tried to be nice. I tried to talk it out. No more mister nice guy!

So I'm writing this from the basement where They tell me I'll be staying untill the three scratch marks and two bitemarks (one on each arm. I like things symetrical that way) on the woman heal.

They're joking, right?